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Oasis - Ch. 5/??

Title:   Oasis - Ch. 5/??
Author:  </a>
</b></a>shirleyann66
Character:   Major Edward Beck
Prompt:   Table 4, #53 - Stars
Fandom:   Jericho
Rating:   PG-13
Warnings :   Well, considering the show has been off the air for over a year, pretty much the entire series may be spoiled in these chapters. Sorry!
Word count:   436
Summary: 
Disclaimer/Claimer:   I do not own nor am I affiliated with Jericho or CBS or any of the other PTB in relation to the show. No infringement is intended. I'm just taking the characters out to play, and will do my best to show them a very, VERY good time. ;)

A/N:  Words in red are Beck's thoughts as he's writing; not what was actually sent.  ;)

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May 1, 2007

 

Jeff -

 

I know I haven't written lately (that's a laugh – like you know.)  This town is getting to me – it's...confusing me.

 

I'm being fed information, I'm being manipulated, I'm being lied to by my superiors, and I don't know what to believe anymore. The information given to me by the one I know is manipulating me – Robert Hawkins – has turned out to be true, and he's proven to me that Valente is lying to me - but the only truth I know for sure is that the information doesn't make it any more palatable that this entire town seems to think – and act – like I'm an idiot.

 

I'm not sure what Hawkins is playing at, but the best chance I have to find out is to allow him to think he's playing me. This whole town seems to be made up of nothing but arrogance and defiance, secrets and lies – except Heather, who is too honest for her own good. I hope and trust that she will never betray me, but I suspect that if push comes to shove, her loyalty is with Jericho and Jake, not me.

 

These are the days when I miss you and Dulcie the most, Jeff. These days when I don't know where to go and I have no one to talk to and no one I can trust to tell me the truth.

 

I miss you and Dulcie in ways I don't even miss Georgette and Abbey. Georgette was my wife – and the things I miss about her are too numerous to mention. Abbey was my daughter – and those memories are sweeter still.

 

But you and Dulcie – you are my origins. My grounding. My foundation. You are the memories no one else can share – not even Georgette – because no one else was there.

 

Tonight, after I confronted Hawkins about the ease with which we found that computer hard drive in that burned out house, I stood in the main street of Jericho and looked up at the stars – and I suddenly remembered those nights we'd lay outside, when we were kids, Dulcie between us, and we'd point out the constellations to her. Or tried to; poor girl – she never could see the patterns the way we could.  We teased her unmercifully as only brothers can do. 

 

Tonight, though, now...I understand how Dulcie must have felt – to see the stars, but be unable to see the constellations.

There is a pattern to what's happening here, in Jericho – but I can't see it. And there's no one I trust – no one I know – who can help me find it or to understand it.

 

Edward

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Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
onceiwasaturtle
Jul. 3rd, 2009 05:11 am (UTC)
Oooh, I really like this one! Bittersweet childhood remembrances always get me.
shirleyann66
Jul. 8th, 2009 02:03 pm (UTC)
Thank you. :)

For me, the bond between siblings is a very unique one, because you share memories/experiences with them that you can never have with anybody else. I'm sure that's true of a lot of relationships, but I guess because these are the people who were there at the beginning of your life, it feels..."different", somehow, to me.

But bittersweet childhood remembrances always get to me, too, and usually are guaranteed to make me cry.

I'm such a sap... ;D

tanaquific
Jul. 6th, 2009 11:31 pm (UTC)
I love the family reminiscences here, and that wonderful analogy of being able to see the stars but not the constellations. You build a terrific sense in this letter of how lost and alone (and confused) Beck is at this point.
shirleyann66
Jul. 8th, 2009 02:11 pm (UTC)
Thank you! There's actually a whole long bit of family reminiscences that I've taken out of this letter for use somewhere else. :)

that wonderful analogy of being able to see the stars but not the constellations.

Thanks! I have to admit that I took that from my own experiences. I can never see the constellations - just can't recognize the patterns, and I thought it was a perfect description of where Beck is at, at this point in the story.

You build a terrific sense in this letter of how lost and alone (and confused) Beck is at this point.

Thanks! My heart just broke for the poor guy at this point - when his belief in/hope for the ASA was starting to waver, but he knew Hawkins was playing him. I just wanted to reach through the screen and hug him and tell him to trust Hawkins, and that everything would be okay...

He was just so alone... :(
falinemalfoy
Dec. 9th, 2009 03:38 am (UTC)
Tonight, though, now...I understand how Dulcie must have felt – to see the stars, but be unable to see the constellations.

That is so beautiful and poignant. A very good analogy indeed :)

I do agree too that the bond between siblings is very unique and special. Always changing but never able to be broken.

Yeah, and as for him being so alone . . . :( He needs a hug hardcore at this point!
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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Oasis - Fanfic in response to the letter100 comm

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